Laura Schlessinger and the Bible

On her radio show, Dr Laura Schlessinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.  The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet.  It’s funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law.  I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.  When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination . End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God’s Laws and how to follow them.

  1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations.  A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians.  Can you clarify?  Why can’t I own Canadians?
  2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus
    21:7.  In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
  3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
    period of Menstrual uncleanliness – Lev.15: 19-24.  The problem is how do I tell?  I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
  4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
    pleasing odor for the Lord – Lev.1:9.  The problem is my neighbors.  They claim the odor is not pleasing to them.  Should I smite them?
  5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath.  Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death.  Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
  6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
    abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.  I don’t agree.  Can you settle this?  Are there ‘degrees’ of abomination?
  7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a
    defect in my sight.  I have to admit that I wear reading glasses.  Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?
  8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27.  How should they die?
  9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
  10. My uncle has a farm.  He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend).  He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot.  Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16.  Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I’m confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan,

James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum,
Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia

(It would be a damn shame if we couldn’t own a Canadian)


The Bitemaster takes both religion and Bible seriously and notes that male homosexuality is a sin the Bible, fully equal to Sabbath violation and adultery. But lesbianism isn’t mentioned at all. So, to those who pick and choose which sins to use to attack others — Bite Me!

Hat tip to extraordinary illustrator Roy Doty.

See Snopes.

Virginia newspaper endorses North Carolina Governor because bathroom bill is sending jobs to Virginia

The Roanoke Times has endorsed North Carolina Gov. Pat McCrory (R) for re-election because his anti-LGBTQ law, HB 2, is driving business out of his state and into Virginia.

Which candidate would do the most to help our local economy? That’s easy. It’s Pat McCrory, the Republican governor of North Carolina. . . North Carolina panicked and made a spectacle of itself by passing HB 2, its so-called ‘bathroom bill.’ In response, various companies and even sports leagues pulled events from the state. Three of those have wound up in Salem ― the NCAA Division III men’s and women’s soccer championships, as well as the Division II Central Intercollegiate Athletic Association football championship. That’s money in the bank for us.

Hat tip to the Huffington Post.

Florida county employee: Pride flag creates ‘hostile’ environment

In the days after the Orlando nightclub massacre, one county worker in Florida said she didn’t feel safe at work — because of a pride flag.

This actually raises an interesting question: What makes for a “hostile work environment”? Is there an objective standard? Is it whatever makes an employee uncomfortable? Maybe Kevin Underhill will supply an answer.

Source: Florida county employee: Pride flag creates ‘hostile’ environment

Men’s rights group wants to march in Toronto Pride parade

When a bunch of men’s rights activists apply to march in a gay pride parade, everyone gets all hot and bothered.

The men’s rights group, CAFE (Canadian Association for Equality), says “The values of Pride are inclusion and diversity, and those are our values.”

The Bitemaster — who has personally marched in a pride parade — has little patience for political orthodoxy and has no more problem with these guys marching in a pride parade, than with gays who want to march in a St. Patrick’s Day parade.

“What about the Klan? Should they be allowed in a pride parade?” Sure, as long as they’re wearing rainbow-colored robes.

Source: Pride Toronto faces controversy over application from men’s rights group to march in parade

Even jerks are protected by the First Amendment

A group of students at McGuffey High School in Claysville, PA, held an “Anti-Gay Day” protest at school, apparently in response to the “Day of Silence” sponsored by the school’s Gay-Straight Alliance.

The anti-gays wore flannel shirts and wrote “anti-gay” and drew crosses on the backs of their hands. That seems like protected speech to me.

But there are also claims that intimidating flyers were put on the lockers of gay students and that someone circulated a “lynch list” (whatever that means). That strikes me as bordering on assault.

Everybody seems to be joining the fray, from Sue Kerr of the Pittsburgh Lesbian Correspondents to Tim Wildmon of the  American Family Association. And so has your Bitemaster.

Pa. high schoolers dress up for ‘Anti-Gay Day’ – NY Daily News.

And see Students At Pennsylvania’s McGuffey High School Organize ‘Anti-Gay Day’ And Allegedly Target LGBT Classmates

Cf: In College and Hiding From Scary Ideas: Universities, rather than being forums for free expression, are encouraging “safe spaces” to protect delicate sensibilities: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/03/22/opinion/sunday/judith-shulevitz-hiding-from-scary-ideas.html?ref=opinion&_r=1

NY St. Patrick’s Day Parade lets gay groups march; Cardinal approves; Messiah’s arrival imminent

“I know that there are thousands and thousands of gay people marching in this parade,” Cardinal Dolan said last year. “And I’m glad they are.” Yesterday he released a statement saying the parade organizers have his “confidence and support.”

We can only hope that the gays who wanted to march in honor of St. Patrick will also show up for Mass.

New York St. Patrick’s Day Parade Lifts Ban on Gay Groups – NYTimes.com.