Failure is an orphan; success has a million parents

Now that Romney has become the official Republican candidate for President, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is claiming he was the first governor to endorse Mitt Romney. Ha! He was beaten to the punch by Nebraska Gov. Dave Heineman and Idaho Gov. Butch Otter — by about four months.

Bite me, Chris.

PolitiFact New Jersey | Chris Christie claims he was the first governor to endorse Mitt Romney.

NJ Gov. Christie a hypocrite? Say it ain’t so!

On the question of legalizing marijuana, NJ Gov. Christie says he’d veto such a bill, saying  “the state should be in the business of undercutting the federal government on that policy.”

But on sports betting, Christie favors legalization: “I don’t think any of us are of the illusion that betting on NFL games isn’t happening every week in New Jersey.”

For the Gov’s hypocrisy, Jon Stewart and the Daily Show took New Jersey’s Biggest Bully to task. Read all about it here: ‘The Daily Show’ calls out Gov. Christie over differing stances on legalizing gambling, pot | NJ.com.

Your Bitemaster, being a bit of a prude, doesn’t approve of either marijuana use or gambling. But he REALLY disapproves of self-righteous hypocrites.

Gov. Christie gloats over veto that never happened

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie claims he stopped Assembly Democrats from raising the gas tax by $2.4 billion: “(Assembly Democrats) wanted to raise the gas tax by $2.4 billion. We said no to that….They’re down on the ground. They’re sweating. They’re twitching. It’s ugly, ‘cause I keep saying no.”

The bill would have raised taxes, but would probably have SAVED the taxpayers money because it would have reduced state borrowing. And, oh yeah, it died in committee. So Christie can Bite Me!

PolitiFact New Jersey | Chris Christie claims he stopped Assembly Democrats from raising the gas tax by $2.4 billion.

Gov. Chris Christie’s claim was not a factual statement

The Jersey dude claimed to have put 10% of the NJ state legislature in jail. A bold claim, for sure. His exact words: “As you know when I was U.S. Attorney we wound up putting 10 percent of the state Legislature in jail during my seven years.”

In fact he actually charged five Democratic legislators and they all served jail time. That’s 3%. An impressive record, but undermined by his narcissistic need to inflate the numbers.

PolitiFact New Jersey | Chris Christie said while he was U.S. Attorney, 10 percent of the state Legislature was jailed.

Chris Christie’s Education Department requires 3rd graders to tell their secrets

Yup, NJ 3rd graders in 15 school districts across the state were required to write essays about their secrets as part of a recent standardized test. It’s all part of the New Jersey Assessment of Knowledge and Skills (NJ ASK), administered by Christie’s Department of Education.

Because the tests are mandatory, Christie can Bite Me.

State exam asks N.J. 3rd graders to write essay on secret they had kept | NJ.com.

Shameless Chris Christie calls teachers’ union bullies!

Again with the name calling, Chris! After establishing yourself as the Garden State’s biggest bully, you have the chutzpah to apply that label to others — just amazing.

And when asked about your children going to private school, you said it’s “none of your business.

Gov. Christie: NJEA leaders are ‘bullies’ that use a ‘$130 million slushfund’ | NJ.com.

Christie flips then he flops

Back in 2010, NJ Gov. Chris Christie campaigned for anti-union demagogue Scott Walker, traveling the country “touting his plan to take on New Jersey’s public employee unions by reining in pension and health benefit costs.”

But Christie changed his tune in March 2011, blaming “liberals in the media” for pointing to similarities in the way New Jersey and Wisconsin tackled public-sector unions, and said contracts should be negotiated through collective bargaining.

Now Christie is traveling to Wisconsin to campaign for Walker in Green Bay and Milwaukee. “There was never a doubt that Walker was going to be no-nonsense when he got into the governor’s office,” Christie’s right-hand man Mike DuHaime said to the Star-Ledger. “He was not going to just be a wallflower. He was going to make chances for what he thought was right. Just like Gov. Christie, he was going to grab problems by the throat and not let go.”

Chris Christie, the most mendacious governor in the history of New Jersey, can Bite Me.

Christie to campaign for controversial Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker | NJ.com.

Chris Christie goes on another _ad hominem_ rant

Like us, NJ Governor Chris Christie prefers the personal attack to actually making a cogent argument. This time, he called his state’s senior senator, Frank Lautenberg, “an embarrassment to the state and the United States Senate.”

As usual, Christie acts more like a minor trollish political blogger than the governor of a state. And that’s why he can Bite Me.

Gov. Christie: Sen. Lautenberg is an ’embarrassment’ for failing to pay tolls | NJ.com.

Conservative hack Chris Christie admits he was a Bush political appointee

Chris Christie, former corporate lobbyist, George W. Bush campaign operative, who probably got appointed U.S. Attorney because Karl Rove approved of him in the midst of Bush’s brazen politicization of the U.S. Attorneys, can BITE ME.

U.S. Attorneys are supposed to represent the People of the United States of America, not the President. But Christie was a proud Bush operative when serving as U.S. Attorney.

You think that’s just me blowing steam? Not a chance. Christie confirmed it at the recent President George W. Bush Institute, where he admitted that he was a Bush political appointee: “I was a proud member of the Bush administration for seven years.”

Gov. Christie: Nation turning into ‘people sitting on a couch waiting for their next government check’ | NJ.com.